Lippy Stuff

Before you read this story it's important to note that my friend, Elana, is completely responsible for all of it. It is all her fault. She recently introduced me to Sass Calamata Feta salad dressing. It was so delicious I immediately ran to the store and bought myself a bottle. I have since been unable to stop eating it. I think I've eaten a salad every day since then, not so much because I'm trying to be healthy but more because it serves as a conduit through which to consume copious amounts of this dressing. I may or may not have considered drinking it.

Last week, through a series of events that are too ridiculous to bother explaining, I left my bottle of salad dressing at her house. I stopped by to pick it up a couple of days later, happy to be reunited with my precious, er, the salad dressing. Last night Elana and her husband came over for dinner, and for part of that dinner we served salad. Except when I opened the refrigerator to pull out the dressing, it wasn't there. Both Elana and I scoured the fridge for the bottle, but it was nowhere to be found. And it is still missing. I have turned the kitchen upside down looking for it, but alas it has disappeared.

I finally gave up the search and decided to buy a new bottle so I could resume my salad binge. I happily trotted over to the produce section to grab my bottle of deliciousness only to find that they were out. Completely out. Oh sure, they had plenty of Blue Cheese and Creamy Ceasar, but no Calamata Feta. GAAAAAHHHHH!!!

I pretty much felt like this guy: